Caught Red-Handed
by Mikauzoran
Summary: Kaito is shot during a heist and wakes up to find himself chained to a hospital bed and under arrest. As Hakuba and Kaito discuss the circumstances behind the thief's capture and the charges against him, Kaito's opinion of the detective slowly changes. With a surprise, feel-good twist at the end.
1. The Charges

Mikau: Hello there! I'm guessing none of you know me. Nice to meet you! I'm Mikau! I usually write over in the Detective Conan section, but I just discovered that there's a Magic Kaito section as well, so you'll be hearing from me. Yep, that's a threat. Hopefully it'll end up being a good thing. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, the henchmen would get a wardrobe makeover. The guys in trench coats that back up Snake have it especially rough. It must be hard to go to work every day and be enthusiastic about doing evil in such horrendous uniforms. I bet you five dollars that productivity would increase were the henchmen allowed to wear zoot suits. Just sayin'.

…

The Charges

Kaito came to to the sound of hospital machines beeping softly and the drumming of impatient fingers on his bed-railing...

The bed-railing that he was currently handcuffed to.

Suddenly Kaito was wide awake.

The drumming stopped.

"Kuroba Kaito, you are under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Everything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be provided for you…. Just kidding," a rather smug voice to his right chuckled.

Kaito slowly turned his head to look at the blonde git sitting at his bedside.

Hakuba smiled sadly. "I'm not an officer, therefore, I'm not qualified to read you your rights, but you _are_ under arrest, Kuroba."

Kaito gulped. This was a nightmare. Just a nightmare. It _had_ to be. He gave the handcuffs chaining him to the railings on either side a tentative tug. They were pretty secure. He was trapped.

And his left side hurt like none other.

"You were shot," his rival explained. "I found you face down in the dirt on the edge of the forest. I…I t-thought you were…I would have treated your injuries myself, but…you needed an ambulance, Kuroba, and there was no time to hide the incriminating evidence. You would have bleed out, and I was more concerned with putting pressure on the wound and saving your life than worrying about you going to jail, so…so you're under arrest." Hakuba averted his golden eyes, too ashamed to face the thief.

"You're saying that you would have covered up for me, if you'd had time?" Kaito finally spoke in a tone of utter astonishment. "Why?"

Hakuba's eyes went wide, his brows rising to his hairline, as he gazed at his classmate in perplexity. He contemplated the other teen for a moment before he finally answered. "Yes, Kuroba, I believe I would have. My first thought after I had ascertained that you were yet living was how I was to save your life without blowing your cover. I myself do not know why, but…I have a feeling that it may have something to do with my sense of sportsmanship.

"This isn't fair. I didn't capture you. I didn't outwit you or outrun you. You were injured. This should have been a timeout, but… I didn't beat you, Kuroba. This isn't my win," the detective muttered ruefully.

"This is a game for you, too, isn't it?" Kaito snorted in amusement. "I thought you were only chasing me so that you could bring me to justice, Tantei-san."

A light blush lit up the blonde's cheeks. "No, actually. I might put on a good show of being righteous, but I'm just as bored as you are, Kuroba…. If I were being honest, I'd have to admit that, of the two of us, you are the nobler. I mean, I'm not the one on a secret mission to save the world from an evil crime syndicate."

"You knew about that, huh?" Kaito let out a long sigh as he settled down into his bed. It didn't look like he'd be permitted to leave any time soon, so he'd might as well get comfortable. "Do you know what they did with my tux and hat and stuff?"

"I believe your trousers and hat are around here somewhere. The suit jacket you may be able to get back. I don't imagine any amount of dry cleaning will be able to get the blood out of it, though."

"You'd be surprised," Kaito quipped. "I've become a bit of a pro at getting bloodstains out of white."

Saguru didn't really want to think about that too much. He would much rather pretend that he didn't know how often his rival got injured. "Regardless, the dress shirt is ruined. They had to cut it off of you…but I did manage to save this." Hakuba reached into his breast pocket and pulled out a handkerchief stained rust red. Hakuba unfolded the cloth and produced Kid's monocle.

"I thought that it seemed precious, so…and I was careful not to get any blood on it. My hands were a little…dirty, so I wrapped it in the handkerchief to keep it clean." Hakuba leaned forward and tucked the monocle into the chest pocket of Kuroba's hospital shirt.

"Hakuba…" Kaito whispered in quiet awe and gratitude. "Thank you. For everything, Hakuba. I'm really in your debt."

The detective shook his head. "No. I'm in yours. I'm convinced that I would have slowly gone mad in England, chasing after the culprits of horrific crimes that just weren't quite…challenging enough for me. I would have lost my faith in humanity and utterly burnt myself out over there. Thank you for alleviating my boredom and restoring my faith."

"I think you're giving me too much credit, Tantei-san, but you're welcome." Kaito closed his eyes. "I guess that's all over now, though. You'll have to find someone else to amuse you…. May I suggest you take up mop-dodging? Aoko's gonna be lonely with her usual playmate in jail…or dead. Those trench-coats are gonna clip my wings for sure as soon as they hear I'm caught. I probably only have a few hours left," Kaito surmised, based on the night's sky outside of his window. It was an hour or two before dawn, judging by the lighting—just a few hours after his heist had come to an end.

He'd be dead by morning.

"No one knows that Kid has been arrested, Kuroba. Well, Nakamori-keibu, your lawyer Kisaki Eri, your mother, the judge and prosecuting attorney on your case, the medical personnel that brought you here, and me. But Nakamori-keibu and I are the only ones that know that you are present in this room at the moment. Even your doctor doesn't know who you are. She simply thinks she's treating some hooligan that got shot in the commission of a robbery. If anyone were coming for you, the both of us would have been dead a week ago when you were first brought in."

"…I've been out for a week?" Kaito managed to ask levelly. He probably looked like hell. Hakuba sure looked like hell. Why had Hakuba been watching over him for an entire _week_?

The blonde nodded.

"Then I guess I'm not getting assassinated any time soon," he hummed. "How many years in jail do you think I'll get?"

Hakuba smirked, and Kaito went back to hating the guy. Up until that moment, he'd slowly been warming up to the detective.

"You'll never guess what they're charging you with," Hakuba chuckled.

Kaito sighed, staring up at the ceiling. "I've never really thought about getting caught. I never considered the consequences... I'm such a cocky idiot."

"True as that may be…" Hakuba's smile widened. "Guess what you're being charged with."

Kaito's eyes slowly closed once more as the list scrolled like a Star Wars prologue on the insides of his eyelids. "Grand larceny, disturbing the peace, destruction of public property, destruction of private property, impersonating an officer, battery…lots of battery and maybe even some assault mixed in there…I don't know. They hardly ever see me coming, so more actual battery than assault…. Driving without a license…setting off pyrotechnics without a permit? What do they charge you with when you knock people out with sleeping gas? Geez, and I don't even know how many counts of each…. I'm going away for life, aren't I?

"Do you think they'll lower my sentence if I act like I'm sorry, or could I get off if I pled insanity? You'd testify that I'm nuts, right? Help a guy out? Or maybe they'd understand if I explained about the crazy crime syndicate…that or they'd think I was crazy, which works, really…. Did I get everything? I feel like I'm forgetting something. Jaywalking?"

Hakuba just laughed. "Kuroba, you're not even close."

"I'd deck you if I weren't chained to this bed," Kaito growled. "It's not funny, Hakuba! I'm going to jail for the rest of my life here!"

"No. You're not." Hakuba wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. "That's what's so funny. You know what you're being charged with, Kuroba? Nothing. Absolutely nothing."

Kaito blinked as his brain processed the words. They still didn't make any sense. "What?"

"No one's pressing charges, Kuroba," the detective tittered. "That's what's so funny. I go around chasing you like a total lunatic, you're finally caught, and you're charged with a grand total of nothing! Everyone you've stolen from _loves_ you…except the ones in jail for whatever illegal thing you exposed them for. What's more, the princess of Sabrina along with the queen and crown prince of Ingram have all petitioned for your full and complete pardon. In fact, the only one who was even remotely upset with you was a one Suzuki Jirokichi. He was going to demand that you replace a certain motorcycle that you crashed and blew up, but his niece seems to have talked him out of it."

"What?" Kaito reiterated.

"You're getting off with a slap on the wrist, Kuroba," Hakuba summarized.

"What?" Kaito felt extremely stupid at the moment.

"There will still be paperwork, but you'll be free to go as soon as you're all better. Though, I'd take this opportunity to retire or find some other way to fight your trench-coat syndicate. I wouldn't push your luck, Kuroba. You never know if the individuals you steal from in the future will be as forgiving."

Kaito nodded, but his shocked expression quickly melted into an annoyed one. "Wait. If I'm not being charged with anything, why am I chained to the bed?"

Saguru shrugged. "So you don't squirm and hurt yourself. Wouldn't want you pulling your stitches out." _"And…a bit for my amusement. I may be fond of the sight of you like this…now that you're conscious and looking so sullen, anyway."_

"What's that smirk for?" Kaito hissed like a cat that had been poked one too many times.

"Smirk? What smirk?" The detective made a point of pretending to look up at the monitor showing Kuroba's vital signs. He hoped the dim lighting of the moon would hide his blush. He'd been caught rather red-handed there, hadn't he?

"Oi, Hakuba," Kaito spit. "Let me out of these things, would ya?"

"We should wait until Nakamori-keibu comes back, don't you agree?" Saguru wasn't sure he'd ever get the opportunity to ogle Kuroba in this state ever again.

"I do not," the thief snapped. "You're enjoying this, aren't you, you bastard?"

"Quite," Saguru snickered as his rival struggled against his bonds.

"Once I get out of here, I'm gonna prank you so hard," Kaito threatened.

"Does that really give me any incentive to release you, then?" The snickered turned into a bit of a dignified, manly giggle. Who was he kidding? A giggle was a giggle.

"Jerk," Kaito pouted, sticking out his lip and giving his opponent the puppy-dog eyes. "Please?"

"Let me think…no." Saguru may have been having a bit too much fun.

"My nose itches," Kuroba whined, looking like he wanted to cross his arms in annoyance.

With a smile, Saguru leaned in and scratched the tip of Kuroba's nose, causing the magician to blush and bristle like a spooked feline.

"Oi!" Kaito protested, eyes going wide.

"Sorry, Kuroba," Saguru finally called for a truce, pulling out the key to the handcuffs. "…I'm really glad that you're alright and that they're letting you off the hook. I'm looking forward to matching wits with you once again as soon as you're feeling better."

Kaito paused, gauging the other teen. He nodded, rubbing his newly freed wrists. "Thanks…. Me too, Hakuba."

…

**_l:::::l_**

**/\**** (**O_**^)**

Mikau: How was it? Anybody see that coming? I'm planning on doing at least one more chapter with Nakamori-keibu and Kaito having a little chat, if you guys are interested. Please let me know what you think. I really take my readers' opinions into account when writing, so if you have any comments/praise/constructive criticism/requests, I'd love to hear it. Drop me a note on your way out, if you have a minute. It'd be most appreciated. Thank you so much for taking the time to read, and I hope to see you again soon! Take care!


	2. The Stern Talking To

Mikau: Hey there! Hope you guys are having a fabulous holiday season so far. Sorry it took me forever to get this second chapter up. I'm in finals season at the moment, so I've been dealing with projects and tests. It's going super well. Hope the rest of my fellow students are having success as well. Anyway, thanks for joining me once again, and thank you so much to my reviewers from last time: , Aniki-xvi, Kaito Dark, and Hayashi Mikako. You don't know how much you're appreciated. And now, on with the show!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, I would have tried to keep Magic Kaito more like the earlier volumes and less like Detective Conan. Anyone else notice in volume four that everything from the drawing style to the plot seems to be more like DC? It's still very good, but I have to say that I preferred MK's own light-hearted, fun style. It did such a good job of mixing the drama and the silliness.

…

Chapter Two: The Stern Talking To

It was about five-thirty in the morning, and the blonde detective was out cold. He had stayed up and chatted with Kuroba for an hour or so after Kaito had woken up, but he'd soon drifted off to sleep.

Kaito, having been in a coma for an entire week, did not feel the need for any additional beauty sleep. He felt he was damn sexy enough and thought it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the male population if he got any hotter. The ladies already swooned in his wake.

Regardless, Kaito couldn't sleep and was unable to even toss and turn thanks to his lovely injury, so he was left staring at the ceiling, listening to Hakuba's soft, even breath. He made a game out of trying to match his own in- and ex-halations to the detective's, desperate to amuse himself and pass the hours in any way possible.

He was so focused on Hakuba's breathing that the sound of the door sliding open caused him to jump.

There in the doorway stood Inspector Nakamori glaring at him for all that he was worth.

Kaito kind of wished he was back in the coma now.

The icy death-glare melted for a split-second into a wave of relief washing over the officer's features, but it was gone just as quickly as it had come, and the glare reaffixed itself to Nakamori-keibu's face.

Kaito smiled sheepishly. "Hi there," he gulped.

"Don't you 'hi there' me, young man," the good inspector growled like a pit-bull. "You are in a world of trouble, Kaito-kun."

Kaito grimaced. "Yeah…that's what I thought. I'd say sorry, if I thought it'd do any good, but I have a feeling you don't want apologies…. I am sorry, though, but I have a good reason for doing what I did."

"Idiot," the older man snapped severely. "Kaito-kun, this isn't about the whole Kid thing. This is about you nearly getting yourself killed, you stupid kid! And I'm not the one you owe an apology. You need to tell your mother sorry for worrying her grey prematurely. You need to apologize to Aoko for lying and stabbing her in the back. My daughter adores you, and you go out there with utterly no regard for your own life! How do you think Chikage and Aoko would have felt if you would of died the other night, Kaito-kun?!

"You selfish, shit-for-brains brat! Touichi's dead. You should have left him that way. I know you love your dad, Kaito-kun, but don't you remember how bad it was when he died? Think about how hard it was for everyone. Do you really want to put us all through that again?! You're just a child! Stop playing dress-up in your old man's suit and go home, kid."

"I can't," Kaito whispered. He didn't have the courage to look the inspector in the eye. "There's something I have to do, and I can't give up and go home until it's done. You don't understand," he mumbled.

"You know what I did when Touichi told me about Pandora? I punched him right in the kisser," the cop snorted, taking a seat on the other side of Kaito's hospital bed, opposite Hakuba.

Kaito's eyes went wide in disbelief.

Inspector Nakamori took Kaito by the chin and forced the boy to look at him. "I get it, Kaito-kun. I really do, but give the hell up already. They've already killed one Kuroba over that rock. I won't let them take another. Besides, they haven't found it yet, and they most-likely won't find it with or without you trying to beat them to the punch. Let it go. Take this opportunity to retire, otherwise I will personally be knocking down your door after every heist. You're done, boy."

Kaito sighed, dropping his gaze to his hands in his lap. "I guess I don't really have a choice, do I? You've kind of got me by the balls, here."

"Like I said…you're done," Inspector Nakamori reiterated solemnly. "And another thing: while you're doling out the apologies, make sure you send one his way." He nodded towards the sleeping blonde. "He's been laughed at and ridiculed because of you, and you've worried him sick on more than one occasion. He's always like a cat in a room full of rocking chairs afterwards on nights where there're shots fired. He's told me he doesn't sleep well the rest of the weekend for Friday night heists until he sees you safe and sound at school on Monday morning… And he was in a bad way last Friday when he found you.

"Thank him too, Kaito-kun. He's hardly slept all week. He hasn't been eating…doesn't leave this room for more than a few minutes at a time. He just sits at your bedside, drumming his fingers on the damn railing and anxiously glancing up at the monitors every few minutes. He's been a nervous wreck with all of your court proceedings going on. I feel bad for Counselor Kisaki. He's been calling her every day to get the latest updates and give her whatever new idea he's come up with for your defense. Together they've managed to get you off scot-free, but he's been wracked with guilt about getting you arrested. I just can't seem to convince him that he did the right thing, so thank him when he wakes up, will ya?"

Kaito reached up and manually closed his mouth before he caught flies in it. Who would have guessed that the blonde git was so worried about him?

"Un," Kaito finally responded, a bit unintelligently.

"Good." The inspector got up with a heavy sigh, patting Kaito's cheek rather roughly, but in a fond manner. "I've said my peace, and now I'm going home to my daughter. You just remember all that I said, Kaito-kun."

"Un," Kaito replied again. "…Thanks. And sorry…but mostly thanks."

Nakamori-keibu snorted, a small smile breaking on his lips. "You're welcome, kid."

And then Kaito was back to trying to matching his breathing with Hakuba's. He quickly tired of this, so he gently nudged the sleeping detective with his foot. "Oi, Hakuba," he stage-whispered.

The blonde stirred, blinking slowly and groggily rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms. "Ng?"

"When was the last time you slept in a real bed, idiot?" Kaito grumbled.

"Been a while," Hakuba responded sleepily.

"Then go home or get your butt up here, or else," Kaito offered an ultimatum. "I'm not letting you sleep in that chair anymore."

Hakuba frowned, looking genuinely conflicted. It didn't occur to him in his sleep-deprived state that Kuroba could do absolutely nothing to back up his threat. Finally, he determined that he would be unable to walk home in his current state (neither did it occur to him to call his caretaker or a taxi), so he cautiously climbed up into the hospital bed with Kaito. He was careful to settle in as close as he possibly could to the magician without actually touching the other teen.

Kaito rolled over on his good side to face Hakuba. "Nakamori came in and chewed me out," he whispered.

"Oh?" the blonde mumbled, not entirely conscious.

"He also told me about how I owed you an apology for literally worrying you sick," Kaito continued.

"No worries, so long as you're okay." Saguru half-heartedly shrugged a shoulder as he subconsciously inched closer to Kaito's body heat.

"I want to thank you too, Hakuba." Somehow this was less embarrassing than he'd thought it'd be, even though, by all rights, it should have been more so. "I'm really grateful to you for saving my life and everything. Everything worked out for the best, even though I can't be Kid anymore. I guess…the only thing I really regret is not being able to bring those slimeballs to justice myself…and…I'm really gonna miss going head to head with you. I suppose we both go back to being bored after this."

"Idiot," Saguru whispered, a relieved (?) smile coming to his face. "There's this game called 'tag' that I think we'd enjoy playing together; I'll have to introduce you to it. And there's always puzzles and riddles that we can pass back and forth to each other as notes during class. We won't get bored."

"You are awake, aren't you? I was beginning to wonder." Kaito smirked. "That sounds…good."

"Of course I'm awake. You're the one that kicked me and woke me up, aren't you?" Saguru sniffed indignantly.

"I didn't kick you," Kaito protested with a bit of a snicker.

"How else would you define your foot making contact with my thigh?" the drowsy detective retorted accusatorially. "Never mind. I'm in no mood to argue semantics with you."

"Oh, but it's fun." Kaito grinned like a shark. "My foot brushing against your thigh? I'd call that flirting."

Saguru's entire body tensed, and he screwed his eyes shut even more tightly. "I suppose you were right. It wasn't a kick. It was more of a nudge than a kick. Let's just settle on 'nudge' and call it a night, shall we?"

Kaito's smirk widened. "Hey, Hakuba? You _like_ me, don't you?"

Hakuba's eyes flew open and a look of cold horror took over his face before he could even attempt to put a lid on his emotions. "N-No. Why would you say that?"

His suspicions confirmed, Kaito sniggered. "Somebody's got a crush. So what do you like most about me, huh? I mean, you think I'm sexy, right?" he pressed, giving his bedmate a playful poke on the cheek.

Saguru turned his head, refusing to look at his tormentor. That was about as far away as he could get at the moment.

"You do. Look at your cheeks going all red. You think I'm hott," Kaito tittered, delighted with the new leverage he'd gained over his rival. "You wanna kiss me, don't you? If you ask real nicely, maybe I'll let you."

"Who'd want to kiss a foul-mouthed, insensitive jerk like you?!" Saguru snapped. "You're mean and spiteful, immature, sadistic, and…and…a suicidal moron with no regard for anyone's feelings but your own. Who in the world would like you, you jewel thief?"

That shut Kaito up quickly as the pieces fell into place in his mind. The detective constantly worried about the magician and was desperate to protect him, going so far as to call long-distance from Paris in order to forewarn Kaito should he just so happen to be Kid. And there had been the time after Nightmare's death when Hakuba had first documented the crime scene with Kid's glove clutched in Nightmare's hand in order to prove that the tuxedo-clad bandit had attempted to save the other thief, and then Hakuba had gone and stolen aforementioned glove so that no one would be able to get incriminating fingerprints from it. There was also the deal with Hakuba pocketing Kid's monocle so that he could ensure its safe return to Kaito simply because it seemed "precious" to the thief. If all of that didn't constitute aiding and abetting a known felon, Kaito wasn't sure what did. Mr. High-And-Mighty had broken the law for Kaito on several occasions.

It was Hakuba who had been desperately trying to get Kaito off the hook for the Kid charges for the past week, and it was Hakuba who had stayed by Kaito's side, anxiously waiting for seven whole days for the magician to regain consciousness.

Suddenly it all clicked.

"Shit," Kaito swore softly, causing his bedmate to sneak a curious glance back at him. "You don't just like me," he whispered. "You're in love with me."

"…I am _not_," Saguru argued weakly.

"Yes, yes, you are," Kaito sighed, rolling back over onto his back. "And I am so sorry. I never would have said any of that crap had I known how you really felt, Hakuba. I just thought that you had a crush on me, but…shit…. You have horrible taste in men!"

"Don't I know it," Saguru mumbled ruefully, turning over as well to lie on is back, shoulder just barely brushing Kaito's.

"Why the hell would you fall in love with an irreverent, childish, perverted, selfish, whack-job like me?!" Kaito hissed, emotions flying all over the place before he could slam his poker face down on them.

He was scared—scared of hurting the closest thing he had to a real friend anymore, scared of the responsibility that came with being precious to someone else, scared of how this newfound knowledge might change the way things were between the two of them, and scared of what the future held for them now that Kaito was privy to Hakuba's little secret. Kuroba Kaito was scared, and that fear was currently manifesting itself as hemorrhaging of the mouth. He just kept talking, words flowing out before he could stop them.

Hakuba finally, graciously, cut him off. "—You're not all bad, you know."

"Huh?" Kaito replied rather intelligently.

"I said you're not all bad," Saguru whispered, a faint blush dancing across his cheeks. "True, you have a terrible personality, and there are times when I frankly get fed up with you, but…bad personality aside, you have a good heart. I was aware of that fact even before I started pursuing you as Kid.

"I researched your alter ego, and a certain matter involving a certain homerun ball came to light, among others. You 'stole' that for the young boy briefly mentioned in the reports. I also recall you recently putting your freedom on the line to rescue a dog that had been accidentally locked inside of a safe. You tried to save Nightmare's life, even though he was a murderer, threatening you and your loved ones.

"I can't tell you how many people I've talked to after they've met Kid, and you know what they all tell me, provided they haven't just had their criminal activities exposed? They all love you and go on and on about how you encouraged them or did this for them or that for them. If there ever was an ally of justice, Kid would be it.

"And then there's the Kuroba Kaito side of this equation. I started…thoroughly investigating you after I learned that you were Kid, and do you know what I found? You're quite the ally of justice yourself what with all the little kids you comfort and entertain and encourage. You put a smile back on people's faces. You cheer strangers up when they look down. You stand up for children being bullied, scold young hooligans, and chase down gropers and purse-snatchers. You may be a tad infantile and self-serving at times, but…you're a good man, Kuroba Kaito, and that's what I like best about you."

Kaito's entire body felt hot. "You're making me blush," he mumbled into the darkness.

"That's two of us," Saguru returned, his own cheeks turning as red as a rover mum. "Can we go back and pretend I never said any of that embarrassing stuff?"

"No. I'm pretty sure I can't un-hear you waxing poetic about me." Kaito swallowed hard. "What the hell are we supposed to do now?"

"Oh, I always imagined you'd either reject me and humiliate me in public or push me down and force me to perform all manner of lewd acts with you when I finally confessed." Saguru suddenly paled when he realized the candid words that had just left his mouth. "Oh, Sweet Mother of God, please, please un-hear that. Kuroba, I haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a week thanks to preparing for your bloody heist and then worrying myself into an early grave about your medical condition and you getting sent to jail. I'm not in my right mind. I don't know what I'm saying. Please pretend you didn't hear that."

Kaito was silent for a good minute and a half. "…Well…I don't plan on publically disgracing you…and we're already in bed, so…but I really can't promise anything too acrobatic, seeing as I'm kind of injured."

"And if you weren't, I'd injure you myself!" Saguru barked, face going wine red as he sat up and glared down at the magician. "Don't tease me like that!"

"What the hell am I going to do with you?" Kaito sighed, giving the blonde's cheek a good poke.

"Do as you like," Saguru snorted but then realized how his words could be misconstrued. "Nothing kinky. I do not intend to be used as your love slave."

"Hakuba? Stop talking. You're only digging yourself a bigger hole." Kaito gave the detective a fond smile.

"Right," Hakuba sighed, lying back down. "Good night, then."

"Oi, I'm not done with you yet," Kaito snorted, rolling to his side and propping himself up on his elbow, careful of his injury.

"Oh, couldn't you be?" Saguru begged. "Please? I honestly haven't slept more than a few hours here and there this past week, and I'd rather not make an even bigger spectacle of myself, if you'd be so kind as to let me off the hook? Please, Kuroba?"

"You're in bed with the man you love—who's currently physically incapable of resisting you, if you were so inclined—and you just want to _sleep_?" Kaito scoffed, slightly offended that Hakuba was having no difficulty keeping his hands to himself. I mean, didn't he find Kaito irresistible? Come on, the magician was a sexy beast, for crying out loud! How was the detective controlling himself?!

Saguru opened one eye in order to glare at his bedmate. "In a word? Yes. Let's get something straight, Kuroba: I love you. There. I said it. I love you. That has little to do with lust. You're more than just a nice piece of flesh that I'd like to permanently affix to my headboard. You're dear to me. You've become an utterly necessary existence in my life. I treasure you, and so while I'd love to submit to my baser instincts and make you scream so loud they'll think I'm torturing you, I shall refrain. I respect you and value you too much to do such a crude thing as to force myself upon you."

Kaito's mouth went dry. He wasn't really sure what to think. Hakuba's passionate declaration of his love and respect had been sweet and touching and, at the same time, thrilling and oddly arousing.

"Geez, you don't know how sexy that would have been, if you were a girl," Kaito sighed. "I mean, I don't necessarily have a problem with the male anatomy on your lower half, but…I really, really have a thing for breasts, and yours…" Kaito gave Saguru's chest a pinch, eliciting a mix between a gasp and a squeak from the detective. "Yours are kind of lacking."

"Kuroba!" Saguru protested, covering his chest with both hands to protect it from further assault.

"Though, if you keep talking dirty like that, I might eventually be persuaded to let the whole chest thing go," Kaito chortled, amused by Hakuba's scandalized expression.

"E-Excuse me? Talking dirty? I do not talk dirty. It's vulgar." The blonde squirmed under the magician's lust-filled gaze.

Kaito smirked, leaning in to loom over his bedmate. "I _like_ vulgar, so you can learn. Tell me about all the 'lewd' things you imagine me doing to you when you finally confess or about what you plan to do to me once you've got me permanently affixed to your headboard."

Saguru looked down and away. "I'm serious about you. I don't want you pursuing me just because you know you could get into my pants if you tried. I'm not just a flesh toy for you to sate your carnal desires with. I'm a person with feelings and hopes and dreams and talents and shortcomings and baggage. I'm not looking for a friend with benefits, Kuroba. I want a partner…a mate."

Kaito looked down at his rival and benefactor, truly considering the other teen. Hakuba Saguru wasn't exactly the snobby, stuffy know-it-all he appeared to be. He was shy and insecure. He hid behind that mask of superiority and bravado, just like Kaito cowering behind his own masks. Hakuba Saguru was a living, breathing human being—fragile…breakable…vulnerable.

"Okay," Kaito whispered. "Why the hell not? It's not like the good inspector is ever going to let me near his daughter again, so why shouldn't I give you a chance? I mean, you did save my life, after all, so, by all rights, I should be pledging my eternal loyalty and promising to serve you the rest of my life, but I guess becoming your boyfriend on a trial basis is good enough, right?"

"Are you serious?" Saguru stared wide-eyed up at his crush.

"Yep. You're not _that_ bad. A little annoying, but if you can put up with _me_, then I have no room to complain. Besides, you'd be gorgeous if you were a girl; given some time, I may be able to think that you look pretty good as a guy too. You'll probably grow on me. Probably…. Hmm…hold on just a sec." Kaito leaned in and stole Saguru's lips before the blonde could protest.

Hakuba's entire body went stiff, but he slowly relaxed and followed Kaito's lead, moving his lips slowly in sync with his beloved's.

Kaito pulled back and smiled. "Not bad. Not mind-blowingly wonderful, but not bad. That's your reward for saving my hide, by the way…. So…how are we gonna do this boyfriends thing?"

Hakuba gulped. In his humble opinion, that had been pretty mind-blowing indeed. "I…was thinking we could start with a date. There are a few places that I may have been considering taking you."

"Yeah? Like where?" Kaito hummed, lying back down and settling in beside his soon-to-be boyfriend of sorts.

"Well, there is a café that hosts an all-you-can-eat buffet of chocolate confections every Sunday. I thought maybe a movie or something like that and a trip to an arcade. Wh-What do you think?" Saguru chewed on his bottom lip anxiously as he awaited Kaito's response.

"A chocolate buffet? And _you're_ paying?" Kaito's eyes went as wide as salad plates.

"Y-Yes. That was my intention."

"You're a keeper," Kaito announced. "I'll find some way to get over my obsession with females."

"Seriously, Kuroba," Saguru scolded lightly.

"Totally serious, Hakuba," Kaito chuckled. "You know how they always say that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach? Well, chocolate's my weakness. Give me chocolate, and you'll have me eating out of the palm of your hand.

Saguru rather liked that idea. "Very well. This Sunday, then. I'll pick you up from your house at noon?"

"Sweet," Kaito confirmed, giving his bedmate a poke. "Now go to sleep."

"_How am I supposed to sleep with you lying right next to me after you kissed me like _that_?"_ Hakuba mentally snorted but closed his eyes anyway. "Goodnight, Kuroba."

"Night, Hakuba," Kaito returned, shutting his own eyes and trying to get some rest. He quickly found it impossible, and, after fifteen minutes of fidgeting without really being able to move thanks to a combination of his injuries, the blonde taking up space in his bed, and the fact that he didn't want to wake said blonde with his movement, he finally settled on studying his new boyfriend.

"_Boyfriend, huh? Guess it's about the same…minus the cushy, bouncy chest. Dammit."_ With a sigh, Kaito took a good look at Hakuba's face.

The other teen was pretty enough, he guessed. He was by no means effeminate, but the lines of face and the curves of his features were all soft and round—definitely not sharp or manly. But really it was a shame. He'd look angelic with long, silky banana curls framing his face, cascading down his back.

Kaito reached out, tentatively taking a strand of blonde hair between his thumb and pointer fingers. It was thin and fine…soft, unlike Kaito's own thick, coarse, unruly locks. Hakuba's hair was like that of an expensive doll's. It'd be a nice tactile experience to run his hands through it when they were making out. He could also see himself gripping Hakuba's hair and tugging lightly whenever it hurt when they were making love.

And then Kaito paused in his observations and considered for the first time if it were really such a good idea agreeing to do this dating thing with Hakuba when he had no feelings besides lust for the blonde. In retrospect, it was stupid, and he was probably only going to end up hurting one or the both of them.

Then again, Hakuba was pretty okay, and he truly loved Kaito, so he at least deserved a chance, and, honestly, Kaito could probably fall for the detective given time. Kaito hardly knew the real Hakuba Saguru that his rival kept hidden behind his own mask. Once the walls came down and the real detective came out, Kaito was sure they could at least become good friends and maybe more.

It would all fall into place eventually, and then Kaito would be the one falling. There was hope for the young, valiant detective, but the magician was probably a goner. I mean, seriously? All-you-can-eat chocolate buffet? Hakuba had Kaito hook, line, and sinker. It would just take a little bit before Kaito would actually admit it.

The

End

…

bed

Mikau: Yes, I'm reusing this emot because I like it so much. The word 'bed' actually looks like a bed. Crazy! Anway, thanks so much for reading guys. I hope you enjoyed it. I'd appreciate it if you dropped me a few lines on your way out, letting me know what parts were good, not so good, funny, and lame. Again, thanks a bunch! Take care until we meet again!


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